Five years ago, an email landed in my inbox that I never expected, and it completely shifted my perspective on life. It was a response to my annual New Year’s tradition: publishing a list of inspirational quotes to kick off the year. This had become my signature start to each year online, always appearing at 12:01 a.m. on January 1st.
(By the way, here’s the latest edition for this year – gotta keep the tradition alive!!)
That particular year marked the fourth time I’d compiled these quotes. Honestly, I was starting to feel done with it. While searching for the quotes was enjoyable, it was incredibly time-consuming. And formatting what essentially became a massive, 10,000-word article for Inc.com every year? A real headache.
Every tiny edit felt like a gamble with the HTML, and I’d often find myself hunched over a laptop in the dead of night at my in-laws’ house, hunting for some rogue piece of code while everyone else was fast asleep, dreaming of the holidays.
Seriously, 2020 nearly broke me. But, after investing so much time and effort (and fully aware of the irony of someone who writes about business ignoring the sunk cost fallacy!), I pushed through, finalized the quotes, and scheduled it to go live.
Then, I pretty much forgot about it until that email arrived. (A heads-up: this touches on the topic of suicide.) Here’s a snippet of what it said:
Hi Bill. You may never read this, but I wanted to thank you, anyway.
I was going to kill myself today. I cry as I type this. …
Then, by chance, I opened your article of quotes for 2020. I read them all. Every one of them.
[Y]ou saved a life … My guess is that you, single-handedly most likely saved a few other lives [too]. Thank you.
My heart stopped. I replied instantly, thanking the sender and urging them to call a suicide hotline. Honestly, I was reeling. What do I even do next?
We exchanged a few more messages. I asked for, and received, permission to share their story and quote their email, though I’ve understandably removed some personal details.
Eventually, they stopped responding. But I noticed a new subscriber to my newsletter with the same email address, and I could see in the dashboard that they were reading Understandably regularly.
Life moved on, as it always does. As impactful as this experience was in January 2020 – and let’s not forget, the Covid-19 pandemic was just starting to throw the world into chaos, affecting everyone’s lives, including my family’s.
One story we Murphys can laugh about now (sort of!) is the time I did some back-of-the-envelope math to calculate my expected tax liability before sending everything to my CPA, who also happens to be a long-time best friend. I made a truly basic error that sent my anxiety levels into orbit.
Basically, a few misplaced decimal points convinced me (wrongly!) that my family was facing financial ruin in the middle of a global health crisis.
Good times! My wife can certainly attest to that!
Even amidst all the pandemic craziness, I would occasionally think about the person who sent that New Year’s Day email. But 2020 was incredibly hectic, and it mostly faded into the background until I started working on the 2021 quotes list.
You can probably guess where this is going. I looked up the email address in my newsletter subscriber stats. No opens in quite a while.
Then I did an internet search. And found an obituary.
A wave of emotions washed over me. I had felt such immense pride and gratitude knowing that my annual tradition had actually saved someone’s life!
But then, it turned out, it wasn’t enough. To protect their privacy, I won’t say exactly how long, but it was less than a year.
Eventually, I came to a different kind of appreciation. Even if the quotes article had only helped this person live for one more day, or one more month—or even just one more minute—it was still meaningful.
This experience made me rethink the value of every moment of life in general. Turning 50 around that time likely played a role too. Of course, I hope I still have many years ahead, and I hope to use that time to do good.
But like any finite resource, life becomes more precious as you have less of it.
And I began to see that the value of life itself isn’t really dependent on circumstances. It’s inherently valuable – all of it.
Sure, we all have moments when we wish things were different: more money, fewer worries, more happiness, whatever it might be. It reminds me of that classic song (if you don’t know it, it’s still worth a listen):
I wish I was a little bit taller
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her …
That song, “I Wish” by Skee-Lo, is now 30 years old, but it’s amazing how often those lyrics pop into my head. The “I Wish I Was A Baller Song” sentiment, that yearning for something more, something different, is so universal.
Image alt text: Skee-Lo performing “I Wish” on stage, capturing the essence of the “I wish I was a baller song” with energy and charisma.
Being 5 foot 7 and hilariously bad at basketball, the first two lines always resonated with me. (Though thankfully, I did find the girl who looks good!)
But I bet you could write your own version of those wishes. It doesn’t even have to rhyme:
I wish I was a little bit better with back-of-the-envelope math.
I wish I had found the magic formula to manage my anxiety and ADHD earlier in life.
I wish maybe my wife and I hadn’t taken a nearly 20-year break between breaking up and getting back together and getting married …
I should probably get to the main point, or rather, points. There are a few.
First, isn’t it incredible that it took me half a century to truly grasp that even the toughest, most painful moments have meaning and value? You could even argue that the most terrible moments do too, although that’s a complex philosophical debate for another time.
In fact, if you consider life a gift, then even those hardest moments are part of that gift. (Credit to Stephen Colbert for that perspective.)
Second, who knows how many positive ripples that person who emailed me created in other people’s lives during the extra time they felt the quotes article gave them?
It’s truly mind-blowing to consider.
Finally, and in a full circle moment, this whole experience changed my ranking of the best inspirational quotes of all time. (Talk about cyclical!)
For years, I’d consistently said that my top two favorites were:
- “The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow.” — H.G. Wells
- “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” — Helen Keller (popular version).
Wells still holds his spot; it’s a solid quote. (See my back-of-the-envelope math error story for a perfect example.)
But as appealing and relatable as the (slightly misquoted) Helen Keller sentiment is, it kind of contradicts my recent realization.
In short, life’s value isn’t dependent on adventure. Adventure is valuable, but it’s a separate thing.
Honestly, this realization hit me hard – and when I tried to put it into words, I realized it was already beautifully captured in pop culture lyrics that had been floating in my ADHD-addled subconscious for decades, much like my Skee-Lo “I Wish” song reference.
Ready for it?
Of all things – of all things! – it’s the opening line of the theme song from the 1975 sitcom, One Day at a Time:
“This is it. This is life, the one you get.”
I don’t even think I was allowed to watch that TV show; I was around 5 years old then, probably more interested in cartoons.
Image alt text: A nostalgic image from the opening credits of “One Day at a Time,” symbolizing the simple yet profound message: “This is it. This is life, the one you get,” connecting to the theme beyond wishing for an “I wish I was a baller song” lifestyle.
Still, somehow, it stuck. It really resonated with me, probably more than it did with anyone watching Valerie Bertinelli back in the 70s:
It doesn’t matter if you wish you were taller or better at math, or even if you dream of the “I wish I was a baller song” lifestyle: This is it! This is life!
(I included that quote as the very last one in today’s new 365 Inspirational Quotes for 2025, which you can find here. Yes, that’s the second link to it, but maybe you’ve forgotten already.)
So, here are my wishes for everyone reading this as we begin a new year:
- First, keep those random pop culture references tucked away. You never know when they’ll become surprisingly relevant and meaningful.
- Second, I hope you experience moments this year where you unexpectedly hear that something you did made a positive difference in someone else’s life.
- Finally, as for the new year itself, we’ll all have ups and downs. I hope you can find reasons to be grateful for and inspired by every single one of them.
(No 7 other things today; this one was a bit long and emotionally draining. Thanks for reading!)
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